England vs Italy - minute-by-minute

[Puja]

Question for the group - should I move this discussion to another thread so this one is mostly the m-b-m for anyone who wants to read in one go, or do we think it's better to leave it here as it was sparked by it?

Mod

[Danno]

Hard to call, but personally I like the MBM to be the MBM plus 'thanks also I saw/this reinforced/that wasn't what I recalled' bits. Big debates not so much. Can argue that the backrow/FH discussions are better placed in the squad thread.

Also I'm a filthy casual aka lurker outside of international windows so weight my opinion accordingly

[Which Tyler]

Hard to disagree

[Puja]

Hard to call, but personally I like the MBM to be the MBM plus 'thanks also I saw/this reinforced/that wasn't what I recalled' bits. Big debates not so much. Can argue that the backrow/FH discussions are better placed in the squad thread.

Also I'm a filthy casual aka lurker outside of international windows so weight my opinion accordingly

That's good enough for me. Have moved to the EPS thread.

Puja

[Danno]

Hard to call, but personally I like the MBM to be the MBM plus 'thanks also I saw/this reinforced/that wasn't what I recalled' bits. Big debates not so much. Can argue that the backrow/FH discussions are better placed in the squad thread.

Also I'm a filthy casual aka lurker outside of international windows so weight my opinion accordingly

That's good enough for me. Have moved to the EPS thread.

Puja

Super. Now get on with the rest of the match.

[Banquo]

Hard to call, but personally I like the MBM to be the MBM plus 'thanks also I saw/this reinforced/that wasn't what I recalled' bits. Big debates not so much. Can argue that the backrow/FH discussions are better placed in the squad thread.

Also I'm a filthy casual aka lurker outside of international windows so weight my opinion accordingly

That's good enough for me. Have moved to the EPS thread.

Puja

Super. Now get on with the rest of the match.

[Puja]

Minute 41: Farrell kicks off and it's again a nothing of a kick - easy catch for Italy, nothing to contest. They try spinning it wide and are lucky not to be caught by England's aggressive defence - they're going backwards fast, but get some go forward as Dombrandt charges up to try and get man and ball, but has misjudged it and instead opened a hole for Negri to run through. The cover brings him down on the 22 though and Italy decide it's better to play safe and kick long.

Farrell takes 50m out, on the touchline and passes long to Steward coming up the middle. Steward takes it on the burst, but loses momentum by trying to get all steppy, and he's tackled easily and turned over for a penalty. Not great play there. Italy kick down to 30m out.

Minute 42: Uncontested Italian lineout ball again and they tap down to spread it along the backline. England are narrower than I'd like, but are also up firmly enough to be blocking off any wide pass and so Italy step back inside instead. Negri carries into Chessum and gets stopped and then wrestled back a few feet - strong work against the best Italian carrier so far.

Italy go through several phases, but our defence has this covered well and the only interesting thing is the ref mic picking up that Sinckler refers to Jack as just "Willis", making me wonder what will happen when Tom inevitably comes to England training. Willis II? 2Willis2Furious? "Tom"?!? The mind boggles.

Minute 43: Italy get a bit of room down the left (and Lawrence is lucky not to be called for a tackle off the ball) and go up to the 22, but Malins makes the tackle. Would've expected him to drive the Italian into touch from that angle though. Italy come over the the other side over two phases and a combination of lack-lustre folding, and some clever screen runners taking out our forwards and we're left short-handed on the right. Farrell commits to going up for a tackle that he probably should've been backpedalling and drifting on, JVP then steps in to take down the player offloaded to, leaving a big gap between him and OHC as the last man. OHC has lost concentration - he is unsure whether he should be coming in to close the gap (possibly), go in to compete at the nascent ruck that JVP's tackle just made (absolutely not, you idiot, you're the furthest wide defender and there's two more Italians there), or back off (probably). He ends up doing none of the above and, more importantly, staring fixedly at the ruck, when he should be looking up at how Italy's attack are moving, most pertinently how Capuozzo is running a line to take the pop pass off the ground. As such, OHC is left in absolute no-man's-land as The Big A-to-the-C waltzes through a gap.

I'm not convinced by Steward's one-on-one defence again here - it's very long and very arm-tackley, but it is against a fantastic runner who has space and speed to work in, and it does slow him enough for the retreating OHC to nail him, so it's good enough for government work. However Cappy-A offloads off the floor and, while our scramble stops the initial attack, Italy have quick ball which they use well - accurate passes, quick recycling, strong runners - our defence is being stretched and never getting a chance to recover.

Sinckler has one eye on the overlap and pushes away from the guard at the side of a ruck too quickly, giving Varney a hole to go through. Itoje does a ridiculous job to get across to scrag him, but it's a seatbelt tackle and Italy get both the advantage and more quick ball, just 3m out now.

Minute 44: Riccioni picks, goes, bumps off Steward, and gets through Genge's despairing tackle to reach over the line.

To assign blame - we've got to work harder in defence, as the original hole was caused by a lack of numbers and players not folding round hard enough. In addition, it's another defensive misread from Farrell, going for a big shot on a player and failing to get man and ball, which helped open the door. Having said that, it was a very well constructed try by Italy, with accurate and quick possession and some very good decisions, with just a bit of magic from Capuozzo. They really are building something strong in this team.

A moment to note Steward, who has not had the best two minutes, firstly giving up the penalty that gave the field position, then two missed tackles. The first on Capuozzo is understandable, but he should be embarrassed by the one on Riccioni for the try. There was no deception or space to work in - that was just standing at guard on a ruck, a man running into another man, with no evasion, and he just got brushed off because he got his head entirely on the wrong side and didn't put his shoulder in. Needs work.

Allan is quick over the conversion, getting it done in under a minute.

Minute 45: England kick off again and, as soon as it leaves Farrell's boot, Italy's catching pod just automatically start meandering back to that nothing space just inside the 22 where every other kickoff has landed. Then they have to reverse and get back going forwards, as this is an absolute beauty of a contestible ball - where the hell has this been for rest of this game?! Malins absolutely soars through the air and taps it back to Lawrence who is in the rare position of having ball in hand without being expected to just smash into the nearest Tommy Allan. Makes a lovely weaving run up to the 22 before being brought down. He presents it beautifully though and it's lightning quick ball for JVP. Chessum carries and pulls back to Farrell, who takes the ball right to the line before putting Malins through a half gap. This is good stuff and Malins just doesn't get his hands free to feed Dombrandt, who's running a try-scoring line.

We recycle quickly, despite some blatant cheating by Italy that the ref just ignores, and a good bust by Chessum gains us another couple of metres. Itoje carries hard aiming between two defenders and this is great play by England. More! More!

[Puja]

Minute 46: Unfortunately, JVP chooses the wrong option from the ruck, passing to Genge who is marked by three Italians, rather than Willis who might've been through, or the pull-back to go wide. Genge makes metres even through contact, but the ball is slowed, and then slowed further when the ref somehow decides that a tackle hasn't been completed despite both Genge's knees being on the floor, meaning the Italians can continue lying on the wrong side and holding onto the ball. JVP and Willis do an excellent job of levering the ball out of that "maul", but the result is that JVP then effectively picks and goes and we lose three forwards to the ruck to clear out.

Mind, I'm spoiled here - I've just counted and it was 4 seconds from JVP being tackled to Ludlam passing from the back and I'm calling that "slow ball". It's still excellent attacking ball, passed well to Farrell on the run and he draws Negri right onto him before popping to Steward, who is unlucky that Italy were paying attention and are able to bring him down. It's quick ball to Genge and England are going to have an overlap if they recycle, but there is some disturbance at the base of the ruck that I can't see exactly because of the camera angle and either Itoje or Genge have knocked the ball on.

We're unlikely to get a replay either, as the television is focussed on the Negri vs Farrell wrestling match. I will back up my defence of Farrell that I made in the game - the tackle was completely legal and Negri has the right to put in such a delightful hard shot on the opposition 10. I'd be cheering it if that was an England player. However, the afters is just unnecessary - a forearm to Farrell's grin and then an open palm in his face trying to mash it into the ground. If the TMO is halfway awake, that is 100% a penalty to England (and, had Farrell chosen to be a footballer about it, could've been a card if he'd protested about fingers going in his eyes). However, it appears the TMO has gone off for a cup of tea and a biscuit, so the ref gives everyone a talking to and says they will restart with a scrum.

A moment of respect for Ollie Chessum's efficiency. He sees his captain is pinned underneath an opposition forward who looks like he might be building up to a full Sandor Clegaine. However, there's also play going on that he should be involved with. He hits the melee like it's a ruck, rolls them over so that Farrell's on top, and then runs off to hit the next breakdown. Model professional!

Also, a moment of respect for Owen Farrell - it's not very long ago that he'd've been stroppy and surly at the referee there, turning him completely against us. Instead, he listens to the talking to and then walks away without losing his temper and getting pissy. Actual character growth? Who knows.

Minute 47: We actually get the scrum done in one go - it spins like a top, the ball bobbles out the side and JVP is fastest to fall on it. Farrell does a belting job running in from 10 to clear out and retain possession. Itoje picks and goes and, in retrospect, that probably wanted to be passed out, as the Italian back row is waiting for him, whereas a pass would've seen Genge running against backs. Still, he makes ground and, while the ball is slowed and Italy have a chance to get their defence in place, we go right with another good carry and then JVP flings a long pass back left where Farrell is calling for it.

It's probably the wrong decision - Farrell appears to be hoping that Italy will have overfolded around to the blind, but instead they've not folded enough and so we've got a 5-on-3 underlap. The smart move here is to reset - step back inside towards the forwards and reset and restart, but Farrell compounds error on error by Kicking Away Decent Attacking Ball: Lawrence x1, JVP x1, Farrell x4. It's a grubber to the corner and to call it optimistic is kind. It's underhit, barely even crossing the 15m line when it needed to go right out to the touchline to get anywhere near OHC, and even if it was perfectly hit, there's still three Italians who are heavy favourites to make it there ahead of any Englishman. Terrible use of a good attacking position.

Padovani gathers with ease and, while he's brought down before his counter can go too far, Italy form a ruck and can box-kick away.

The television shows an aerial shot of the KADAB and it's worse than I thought - it was actually on to go wide there. Steward was drifting on the pass and, if Farrell had passed immediately and accurately, then he was likely arcing around 4 of the 5 defenders and likely putting OHC away in the corner. I looked at it from the flat level and wondered whether to give Fazlet a pass because we'd gone the wrong way and he was isolated so a kick might've been his only option, but from above, the decision was right the first time and our beloved captain just lost his bottle and decided to kick and hope instead.

The referee is being an utter pedant about the lineout spacing, but has at least stopped the clock while he delivers his TED talk about the spacing, so we're still in Minute 47 when the ball comes in and Itoje takes. We go for the tap to JVP and wide pass to Farrell who runs up and then offloads to Lawrence on the crash. Allan is getting smarter though - he actively steps out the way of NewTuilagi and lets his forward bodyguards deal with him.

Minute 48: Willis and OHC are not quick enough on the clear-out, and Zuliani is lightning in over the ball. He deserves that turnover penalty, as that was excellent work.

Italy kick up to near halfway and again take uncontested lineout ball. Hopefully this is going to be something that Sloan Braithwaite is planning to add on later - he did this with Leicester, layering one thing on at a time, sometimes leaving us bereft of a particular tactic cause we hadn't worked on that bit yet. No denying it was effective, but I do hope he gets round to adding in "compete at lineouts" before the France game.

Italy play into the midfield and we bend a little bit (Farrell getting bounced in a tackle when he went too high), but we look solid and a compete from Willis comes close to a turnover and slows down the ball. Next phase, we can get up aggressively again and Itoje catches Brex behind the gainline to start knocking them back.

Minute 49: Italy pass away again and this time Genge is flying up on the first receiver at full tilt. It looks for all money like there's going to be an imminent murder, but it's Negri who has the ball and he braces himself and twists slightly to take the tackle on his elbow and hip. Genge gets his head on the wrong side and, what should've been another 10m defensively for England, leaves Genge needing an HIA that he never gets, Sinckler with a bleeding head after catching a flying Genge boot, and Negri with a couple of metres to make ground, which he gratefully does. However, Ludlam is lightning quick on the jackal himself this time and robs the ball before he's cleared away.

JVP picks and goes and... I'm not giving this one as a KADAB, because it fails test c) of it resulting in the opposition having safe possession - he kicks a long grubber that pins Padovani in the corner of his 22 and then England turn over the ball for a penalty as soon as he's tackled (great work by Dombrandt on getting there and putting in a belting jackal). It is a very good attacking kick. However, OHC must be crying, because if JVP passes to Farrell, then it's a 2-on-1 and OHC is through with acres of space - not a guaranteed try, but at minimum a 20m run and he'd have to fancy his chances 1-on-1 with the last defender in that much space.

It was a good option, executed very well, with a good result. But it feels like a try-scoring opportunity missed.

Minute 50: Sinckler is off for Cole and England celebrate by kicking the penalty to the corner. Ludlam takes the lineout at the front and we've set pretty well (still could be lower!) and roll around the front. George does a decent job of staying at the back this time, but Italy swing round the back and bring him down before he can make the line, so the ref gives a penalty try and yellow card.

26-7 to the good guys.

[Puja]

Minute 51: Italy kick up to the 22 and Chessum takes the ball well, albeit under very little pressure. He then makes a good few metres through contact and Dombrandt compounds that by picking and going as soon as he's tackled, bursting through for another 5m gain. I think it's on if we chose to go wide, but we've got little to no interest in that and the ball goes back to a deep-standing Farrell who lamps it up to the Italian 22.

Minute 52: Italy kick it back and we make a bit of a hash of getting underneath and three players call it as someone else's. Still, the bounce of a rugby ball for once doesn't hate us, and JVP carries forward before pitting up a good high ball. Steward is on the chase and should be competing, but he appears to lose the trajectory, and is also lucky not to give a penalty away for a shove in the back of an Italian player who appeared to be genuinely looking to get under the ball. That's the second one of those shoves he's dealt out today - I hope it's not a trend, cause other refs will penalise those. Italy claim the ball, but then kick away aimlessly, and Farrell has plenty of time to pick his spot and get a nice touch about 8m inside the Italy half.

We once again don't compete on Italy's throw, but that doesn't stop them cocking it up with an overthrow. The ball is tapped sort of in Italy's direction, but it's bobbling loose at the back of the lineout and it's a race between Menoncello and Genge as to who will throw themselves on it first. Menoncello looks at what's coming and decides that he wants absolutely none of it, instead throwing a foot wildly at the ball while trying to get out of the way. We regather, set up a ruck and then go right one phase, before swinging back left. Farrell picks the right pass and Chessum is on the charge for another few metres.

Minute 53: We carry up again, before passing open, except Farrell thinks he's seen something on the blind and immediately hares sideways across the pitch. He's absolutely bang on as well and it's a great read - as soon as he rounds the ruck, he's on a 3-on-2 and OHC is away again! However, OHC must've insulted the gods somehow today, as the opportunity disappears when Farrell decides to show and go and try to sidestep through all of the defenders that've just got up from the ruck, rather than passing. Why run all the way over there and then *not* pass?!

He gets fairly chunkily dealt with by some nasty-looking forwards, but manages to offload to JVP as he's carried off to his gruesome death. JVP then decides that, as the captain's decided to run sideways across the pitch like it's an Under 7s game, so will he. His is a little more effective, but it's still a shame that he doesn't pass before contact, because the Italian defence is confused as anything right now and there are potential holes. Slade steps up as scrum-half and passes to Steward, who decides to step inside rather than run outside and try to run through a back row and a prop. It goes about as well as you'd expect - he's really had a poor second half so far.

The ball comes back to Farrell and, once again, there is opportunity here - Lawrence is looping round behind Chessum and a pass to him gives him acres of space to run into. However, Farrell reverts to type by Kicking Away Decent Attacking Ball: Lawrence x1, JVP x1, Farrell x5.

Now this KADAB may seem harsh, as it is a beautifully executed and placed kick, going over the head of the last Italian player and bouncing twice before going into touch 5m out. However, I am going to refer you to the KADAB protocol - we have the ball 35m out from Italy's line (and it's relatively fast-paced and against a disrupted defence), there were several other options he could've gone for, and the kick wasn't a try-scoring opportunity. One might say that a 5m lineout is pressure on the opposition throw and a worthy reward in and of itself, but we've not competed on the Italy throw all day and they've been solid bar one cockup. That's not a good attacking opportunity. What it has done, is fulfilled test c) resulting in the opposition having safe possession from which they've got the ability to clear in relative comfort.

Yes, it's a technically nice kick. But what it's done is take our good attacking ball 35m out and turned it into Italy ball 5m out. It's a waste and the best case scenario is that we get the ball back about 35m out again after Italy kick it to us.

And to make things worse JACK FUCKING WILLIS is coming off to be replaced by Earl. I'm hoping that's just to wrap him in cotton wool as our best chance of beating the Welsh.

The lineout happens. Italy win uncontested lineout ball at the front. They carry up to 10m out, set a caterpillar and...

Minute 54: ...box-kick to touch, 48m out. KADAB. Oh, yeah, OHC was on the outside of that potential Lawrence break as well - the gods absolutely hate him today.

Still, we win our own uncontested front lineout ball, tap down to JVP who's inside our half and try attacking again, this time against a set defence and 15-20m further back. For a change, Farrell passes to Dombrandt on the crash, who makes good ground. He has been better than I remember him being. It's quick ball and we run a very similar play with Slade and Steward on the crash, bringing us up to the 10m line. JVP then throws a very iffy pass that's a good two feet in front of any of the England players. If we're being kind, maybe he was expecting them to be running onto it, although that is very generous. It works though, as Italy have focussed on the loose ball and, when it bounces really well and lands in Malins's hands, he's away down the right. He runs for 10m and, if he holds onto the ball for another half second, OHC is sprinting up on his inside, screaming for the ball. He's in, this is the first try, this is the start of the Hassell-Collins era as long as Malins doesn't engage in Kicking Away Decent Attacking Ball: Malins x1, Lawrence x1, JVP x1, Farrell x5.

It's a very optimistic grubber that Brex was always favourite for. At the very least, Malins should've held onto the ball and taken another 10m in exchange for being tackled. Now Italy have the ball and all OHC has is a complex.

Minute 55: Italy run another phase to take it in fron the touch-line and then Varney nearly manages to get charged down by Itoej despite having a whole caterpillar ruck to protect him. However, it's the worst of all possible worlds, as Itoje gets enough on the ball to make it Italy's lineout, but not enough to stop it making touch outside the 22.

Genge is off for MakoV - hopefully he'll be better this week. Can't really be much worse. There is a brief frisson of excitement as Henry Arundell enters the fray and OHC is put out of his misery. I plan on making a note to see how long it takes before this England team make a pass to their most exciting back. I'm sure it'll be at the first opportunity.

Italy take the lineout and, while we don't compete in the air, Itoje is lurking at the back to pounce on the Italian dummy half and the ball spills loose. Great work, but unfortunately Ludlam spills a difficult pickup and we concede a scrum. I'd've thought the ball went forward from the Italian hand when Itoje snagged his arm, but we don't get a replay and it's impossible to see if Itoje grabs the arm and the Italian knocks on, or if Itoje slaps it backwards (which seems against the laws of physics from that angle, but it's what the ref's apparently seen), so we've got a scrum to enjoy.

And, while I don't want to leave you on a cliffhanger, I think that's me done for the evening.

[Danno]

Many things to enjoy in your prose, Puju. Thanks as always

[Which Tyler]

The ball comes back to Farrell and, once again, there is opportunity here - Lawrence is looping round behind Chessum and a pass to him gives him acres of space to run into. However, Farrell reverts to type by KADAB.

I think I've spotted the reason for this KADAB.

[Oakboy]

Puja, in minute 46 you mention JVP taking a wrong option. At international level, in a noisy stadium, any idea what degree of communication there is in such situations? Set pieces can have set plans but rucks? If the general strategy demands quick ball does the SH arrive with a passing direction already in mind is what I am getting at. Assessing options by gazing about at the back of a ruck has been Youngs's big issue (by definition supplying slow ball), arguably.

[Puja]

Puja, in minute 46 you mention JVP taking a wrong option. At international level, in a noisy stadium, any idea what degree of communication there is in such situations? Set pieces can have set plans but rucks? If the general strategy demands quick ball does the SH arrive with a passing direction already in mind is what I am getting at. Assessing options by gazing about at the back of a ruck has been Youngs's big issue (by definition supplying slow ball), arguably.

You are right and I prefer JVP's style of actually getting the ball out - an okay decision made quickly is generally better than the perfect one made far too slowly. However, at that ruck it wasn't a question of direction. All three options were to the right - short to Willis, wider to Genge, pull back and very wide to Malins - and JVP actually picked and went to interest the fringe defence, so he had half a second of ball-in-hand to make his choice.

It was probably a bit of a harsh nitpick though.

Puja

[p/d]

Puja, in minute 46 you mention JVP taking a wrong option. At international level, in a noisy stadium, any idea what degree of communication there is in such situations? Set pieces can have set plans but rucks? If the general strategy demands quick ball does the SH arrive with a passing direction already in mind is what I am getting at. Assessing options by gazing about at the back of a ruck has been Youngs's big issue (by definition supplying slow ball), arguably.

........ Twickenham!!!! I reckon you could hear Dave fart from Row W during the game

[16th man]

For a change, Farrell passes to Dombrandt on the crash, who makes good ground. He has been better than I remember him being.

We all appear to be guilty, to a greater or lesser degree, of judging him based on how much he is doing of the things we expect from him & how much of what Billy used to do he is getting through, and not what he actually did do in the game.

[Which Tyler]

For a change, Farrell passes to Dombrandt on the crash, who makes good ground. He has been better than I remember him being.

We all appear to be guilty, to a greater or lesser degree, of judging him based on how much he is doing of the things we expect from him & how much of what Billy used to do he is getting through, and not what he actually did do in the game.

Which is pretty similar to how Itoje is getting judged harshly at the moment - what we see vs what we expect.

In Dombrandt's case - I'm happy to see him putting in a good shift of the basics, as that's where questions lie.
In Itoje's case, then for myself, I'd rather see him doing those highlight reel moments of his that grab a match by the scruff of the neck and turn it in our favour - even if that means leaving a bit more of the hard-graft for Chessum to handle.

[Puja]

Minute 56: The ref once again takes over 4 seconds between both Crouch and Bind, Bind and Set, and then gives a free kick to Italy when George attempts to anticipate and draws the brake foot back early, causing an early engage. As a member of the Front Row Union, dicking about with the calls like that is cruel and unusual punishment and is usually the result of a ref desperately keen to show that *he's* in control godsdammit, without any feel for the game whatsoever. Hopefully he'll get called on it in his review and become a better ref for it.

Italy kick to touch just inside England's half and we again go quickly on our lineout, throwing to the middle for uncontested Chessum-ball. Off the top and into midfield, where Farrell invites Dombrandt on the Allan-bothering line. Oddly, Lawrence is not in the picture at all this time, so it's obvious where it's going, but Dombrandt makes a decent dent in the Italian line to give us ball just over the line of the lineout. We then decide it's best to pass it back 12m for Slade to kick it up in the air, and Capuozzo takes about 15m in front of where Dombrandt ran up to. Italy recycle and play into the midfield with a forward trucking it up.

Minute 57: Varney does a little dink box-kick over the top and it's very well weighted to give an Italian lock a run onto it against a retreating JVP. Thankfully he spills it forwards and we're going to have a scrum.

Unfortunately, Dombrandt has had an absolute mare at the back. The hook isn't the cleanest and skews over to Ben Earl's feet on the openside flank. Earl does a good job of controlling it and then rolling it across to rest against Dombrandt's back foot, like he's a pro table football player, but Dombrandt hasn't seen where the ball has gone and seem to think it's stuck in the second row. We then get the comedic genius of Dombrandt switching channels, looking for the ball, before unbinding entirely and standing up with his head bobbing like a chicken that's sure there's some grain around here somewhere, seemingly completely unaware of the facts that a) the ball's by his left ankle and b) he's a complete tosspot who's just unbound from the scrum and made the ball completely open game.

The ref, for some reason, also doesn't understand b) and warns Varney off initially, but Varney is then in a position to hoik Dombrandt's hand as he belatedly picks up the ball and tries to pass away. Absolute comedy all around.

Italy get the loose ball and kick away their advantage to Steward on the 22. He puts in a belter of a kick that Capuozzo does very well to field right on the touchline, on his own 22.

Minute 58: Capuozzo runs at the gap between the chasers, then chips and chases, only to find that neither Slade nor Steward are inclined to let him through. They've possibly narrowed the gap to block him, but it's marginal and subtle if they have and I'd chalk that up to good defence. The ball dribbles out for an England lineout, just inside England's half, and we're back where we were 2 minutes ago, just the other side of the pitch. This time it's Itoje at the back and we go for a very solidly constructed maul (although could and should be lower still). Unfortunately, it's JVP's turn to cock up set-piece ball, as he goes the wrong way around the maul and finds himself pickpocketed by Riccioni, who was legally bound in on England's side of the maul.

Italy make a quick 12-13 metres through offloads and pick and drives, but Itoje puts a stop to it with a picture-perfect jackal that rips the ball back. We've got a chance to set a ruck and reset ourselves, but Earl gets in JVP's way, picks up the ball, and then dallies long enough to get caught mid-pass by Varney. Poor. However, Varney is a mile offside, so we do get the penalty.

Minute 59: A note for Ludlam, who was first to the loose ball and clearing up Earl's mess there. If that hadn't been a penalty, him getting there first was huge, because our defence was shot and Italy could've been away.

Farrell kicks the penalty down to 35m from Italy's line and England run into the lineout and take uncontested ball with Itoje. I am liking our urgency into these lineouts. It's tapped down to JVP and goes into midfield where Farrell runs hard enough to interest Allan's inside bodyguard before popping the ball off to give Lawrence a one-on-one with his favourite skittle. He rides the tackle and accelerates away, getting deep into the 22 before getting hauled down. His ball security is mince though, as a stray arm knocks it out of his grip. Italy have a brief, chaotic attempt to go from behind their line before being forced to accept the inevitable and a scrum.

Minute 60: Replays of the Lawrence bust. The ball going loose was because he was holding it between hand and forearm (and thus being able to pump the ball and arm together in his running movement), rather than tight to his body. Understandable in a way, because I'd imagine that does give him an extra cm or two of pace, but he needs to adjust when contact is coming, because that ball would not have gone loose had he held it close as the tackle came in.

Mitchell is on for JVP. I will take a minute to note that it is now 5 minutes since Henry Arundell has come on and he has not touched the ball once. The closest that he has got was chasing the Slade high ball.

The scrum is solid, Polledri picks from the base, and Ben Earl has apparently decided - for the second week in a row - that getting up from a scrum is entirely optional for an openside flanker. He takes 2.5 seconds from Polledri unbinding to leave the scrum, at which point Polledri is already past him and aiming for our inside backs. Farrell puts in a tackle that's too high and with poor technique and it's utterly ineffective (not to mention a Polledri slip away from a yellow/red card). Thankfully Mitchell is covering to save OhCaptainMyCaptain's blushes, but Italy get quick ball, having gained 15m from Earl's langourousness.

Italy look to go wide, but a floaty pass from Allan takes all the space and Padovani is much more concentrated on the defenders that are now going to tackle him than he is on catching and spills it forwards.

[Puja]

Minute 61: For a moment, Arundell nearly got the ball, but it bounces the other way to go to Lawrence. He pops inside to Earl, who find Farrell and Malins and this is all going very lateral. Malins does well to change direction and go in a mazy run the other way across the pitch - it's a bit early Jonny May, but he's interested a lot of the Italian defence and he makes a great little pass to an onrushing Ben Earl just before he gets tackled and I think this is really on here. It's a 5-on-2 and, while the last Italian defender is pushing up, he's got the ball in two hands and a variety of different options - run himself and offload, little pop for Lawrence to run at retreating defenders, miss pass to Slade to have a 2-on-1, over the top miss pass to Arundell in 10m of space, or Kicking Away Decent Attacking Ball: Earl x1, Malins x1, Lawrence x1, JVP x1, Farrell x5

Note to any forward who considers themselves to have "the skills of a back" - just because you are capable of kicking a ball competently, does not mean that you should.

Capuozzo gathers comfortably and is nearly away, but for a good tackle from Earl who did owe us that one. He is up an on his feet and competing for the ball, but gives away a penalty with a very strict call by the referee about him not being 100% around the right side before he starts jackalling. It's technically correct, as he's in the process of swinging his body around, but it's very harsh and you'd get away with that 9 times out of 10.

Italy kick the penalty up to their own 10m line and win a lineout that we do actually compete at for once, if not particularly effectively. They tap down and pass into midfield and our backs get themselves into a phenomenal tangle when faced with a fairly straight-forward screen and pull-back move. I think we are initially supposed to be blitzing, but Farrell abruptly changes his mind and screeches to a halt. I think he thinks the ball is going to the forward runners, rather than out the back, and doesn't trust his inside defenders to deal with it, so is trying to turn back to catch them himself, which means he then has to abort that change of direction when the ball is passed back and then further wide. Lawrence, gods bless his little cotton socks, is mirroring his inside man, and abandons the blitz as Fazlet does. Slade, on the other hand, has not seen/heard what is happening, and is charging up with a cry of Leeroy Jenkins on his lips. It's not the right call anyway even if his inside defence were with him - he's far too narrow and Italy just pass across the face of him. Malins is watching the car crash happening on the inside and, rather than backing off and trying to give Slade a chance to make it back across so that we're numbered up again, he decides to charge inside and try to get to the second-last man before the ball goes. He arrives about the same time as Slade - a good second after the ball has been passed away wide, for Menoncello to have the freedom of the 15m channel.

Minute 62: Slade manages to scramble across to bring down Menoncello on the halfway line, but he's able to offload to Capuozzo on his outside and this is carnage. Capuozzo draws Steward and passes to Varney, but Earl has tracked back well and hauls him down inside the 22. Italy offload again and go a touch further, but some dubiously legal shenanigans from Dombrandt slows the ball and our rush defence can then drive Italy back to the edge of the 22. Italy go wide again, but Mitchell knocks on while tackling and Italy don't get any advantage as the loose ball bounces to Arundell - he beats two Italian defenders in a ridiculous display of footwork, but it's for naught as we come back for the scrum.

Minute 63: The ref is once again a dick with the scrum calls, but this time we get it completed and Italy pass away to the opposite side. We're mostly numbered up, but Brex dummies and steps inside to leave Slade for dead. Lawrence brings him down, but ground is made and our defence is retreating. It's also a mess - Dombrandt is blitzing, but there's a massive gap outside him as Mako and Cole are trying to get across from the scrum. They both press too hard to get across, meaning that when Menoncello runs fast across them, they have no chance to change direction. Chessum has not followed his front rows well enough (also appears to be blitzing, for some reason), and Menoncello strolls through a gap. Arundell covers across, but is beaten one-on-one and, while his tackle attempt is enough to slow Menoncello enough that Itoje can finish the job, there's enough forward momentum that Italy get quick ball and Fusco can attack retreating defenders. He busts through a tackle to reach over the line.

There has been a bit of fan-grumbling about the gap for Menoncello being opened by blockers and comparing it unfavourably to the disallowed JVP try, but once again, I'm going to side with the ref on this one. Chessum has overrun and it's his fault that he's on the wrong side of the Italian, and, while the Italian prop may've been in Cole's way had he been going to tackle Menoncello, Cole wasn't even aiming towards him, let alone in any position to tackle. The only reason contact is made is because Cole realises Menoncello's gone and actually reaches out an arm to grab at the prop so he can complain at the ref.

Incidentally that Arundell attempted tackle was the first actual involvement he's had in the match in 9 minutes of being on the pitch. Get rid of him; he's rubbish.

Minute 64: Allan scores the conversion and England are suddenly not in a hurry anymore. Slow walk up to the kickoff.

Minute 65: Farrell kicks it long, but not particularly high, and Italy reclaim easy ball. Yeah, cause why should we repeat the trick that worked really well for us last time and compete for the ball? That's just what they'll be expecting us to do!

Italy carry hard and then go wide - we're badly outnumbered and Allan picks the right option to put Negri through a gap at pace. Mitchell manages to bring him down, but Italy have made 30 metres and are against a retreating, demoralised, and disorganised defence, which of course leads to Kicking Away Decent At... wait, I don't care if they do that. Fusco kicks long and Farrell has loads of time to catch and return it back down to the 22, at which point, we get the comedy show that is Capuozzo one-on-one with Dan Cole. Gods bless him, Cole's done so well to chase up and get there, but he may as well not have bothered - Capuozzo practically pats him on the head as he walks by untouched. He passes wide to Zuliani and the try is now on - Zuliani is up against our last defender of Malins and Capuozzo is looping around. All Zuliani has to do is hold onto the ball long enough to interest Malins and pop a short ball left and they're in for the try! Except Zuliani decides his best option is Kicking Aw... sorry, just so used to counting these.

It is worth repeating: Note to any forward who considers themselves to have "the skills of a back" - just because you are capable of kicking a ball competently, does not mean that you should.

The ball rolls to Farrell, who has loads of time to kick long. This one hits grass inside the Italian 22 and the bounce bobbles away from Allan, killing any immediate chance of a counter-attack.

[Puja]

Minute 66: Allan picks it up and has a think about running it anyway, but England's chase is coming and he decides that discretion is the better part of valour and lamps it into touch instead on the 10m line.

Dombrandt is off for Isiekwe. He was much better than I thought on first viewing, although still the weakest of our starting back row. Isiekwe shows Arundell how to be a substitute by immediately getting involved in a maul off the lineout. It's going quite well, but Italy are attempting to fold around the side. Dan Cole shows off all his experience by just unbinding and forcing the Italian defender who was bound on him to let go as well. MakoV has two Italians bound onto him who are blocking Mitchell getting the ball away and he's got himself into a shit position as well - the Italians have got under him and driven him up, so he's upright, walking sideways, and facilitating two blue pains in Mitchell's arse around the wrong side. Yet he stays attached to the maul, all the way until we're driven into touch. Poor.

Polledri rips the ball from George who isn't paying attention and throws a long pass for a quick lineout. It's a great decision as England's defence is all over the shop - Slade flies up and does absolutely nothing, leaving everyone else short. Farrell does an excellent job in backing off Brex until he's used up the overlap with sideways running and then drags him down. Lawrence and Slade are aggressive at the ruck and Italy spill the ball backwards, losing all momentum from the counterattack.

Minute 67: Italy probably knocked on there, but they reset and then pass to the centre again, attacking from within their own half. A good carry by Polledri shortens our defensive line and the next phase Allan puts in a gorgeous little cross-field chip to land right in Ruzza's hands. He steps Slade well and takes on Arundell and Earl, only to lose the ball in contact. Allan grabs the loose ball and flicks it behind him for a pass that lands in Arundell's hand a split second before the referee makes himself very unpopular with the crowd by blowing for the knock-on. It's very understandable - to him, it looked like Italy knock on, Italy regather, no advantage, blow whistle. Would've been a guaranteed try though, although possibly not very fair to Italy in terms of what they deserved from the game.

Minute 68: Nothing happens, as both sides fail to scrummage and the ref fails to referee.

Minute 69: England drive through and wheel - it's entirely possible that this should be a reset, as that looked more like a wheel than it did Italy cheating, but I think everyone's happier that this ref's not insisting on another scrum. This minute isn't exactly jam-packed with action either, as it takes a while to clear away the messy scrum and for England to kick for a lineout just outside the 22m. Itoje takes at the back of the lineout with the final second and we form another maul that's still higher than I'd like it to be.

Minute 70: This maul is going well - Italy try to swing aorund the back, but Chessum is wise and detaches to force them to let go. Good intelligent play by England here. Eventually it becomes messy (it does lok like cheating by Bigi) and Earl has to break clear. We just about retain the ball with Mitchell rucking and reset with a couple of forward rumbles. We then pass out to Lawrence, who actively steps inside so he can run into Allan - always good to have a hobby.

Italy have folded enthusiastically, so Mitchell picks up and goes left. However, the first man is Cole, who has little to no interest in running, let alone running a hard line off him, so Mitchell dummies and goes left. Itoje and Chessum are getting back onside, so Mitchell dummies and goes left. Arundell has come with him, but he's going sideways too, so Mitchell dummies and goes left. Eventually, he manages to get around the penultimate defender, reaches through the tackle of the last one and offloads to Arundell, who makes a neat little stop and go to unbalance Polledri and allow him to power through in the corner.

[Puja]

Minute 71: It's a good finish by Arundell, but it's a weird try. Mitchell basically has a 2-on-5 underlap if we're just looking at England players who can realistically receive the ball and he gets away with running sideways around them all, simply by looking like he might pass or step inside any moment. I don't know whether he's just that elusive-looking or if it's because all the blind defenders were forwards, or what. Doesn't feel like it should have worked, but it clearly did. Probably not one to try against France though.

Minute 72: Farrell takes a lot of time and then hits the post. 31-14 and a reminder that it took 15 minutes for Arundell to receive his first pass.

Minute 73: The kickoff goes long to Ludlam, who resets in an okay fashion, albeit not as good as Dombrant's restarts have been. We recycle in a very awkward fashion and then Mitchell kicks the ball to touch.

Minute 74: Jack Walker has made it onto the pitch. Have fun Jack! Marcus Smith is also on for Farr... Slade.

Italy throw a long lineout over the top and, apparently, Allan has decided he's had enough of England running in and hurting him. Instead he's going to seize his own destiny, and run in and hurt himself instead. He runs onto the long throw and nearly fumbles the ball, regathering it just in time to have Ludlam rearrange his ribs. Italy try and go quickly again, but they fumble at the base for an England scrum.

Minute 75: We don't manage a scrum, but the ref gives a penalty to England for... something. Not sure. We kick to touch 30m out.

[Mikey Brown]

I remember having literally no reaction to that try. It seemed like a complete nothing moment and indicated how uninvested in the game I was, but you've done a good job of explaining why it was so odd. It should have been exciting, but Italy just looked awful. Have they really improved and we were just making them look worse, or were they having a bad day? These games are never fun to watch. Even when we have exciting players out there.

I hope Wales step up from last week.

[Puja]

Minute 76: Jack Walker gets his first use in international rugby with a functional middle ball throw to an uncontested lineout. It's tapped down to Mitchell and passed wide to Smith, who sends Earl up, but unfortunately your Allan was in another castle and Earl gets clumped back by two tight five forwards. We get momentum on the next forward carry off Farrell, but unfortunately Smith decides to celebrate this by Kicking Away Decent Attacking Ball: Smith x1, Earl x1, Malins x1, Lawrence x1, JVP x1, Farrell x5. It's a grubber through that Italy had players back to cover anyway, but Brex sticks out a boot and blocks it at source, causing the ball to bounce free and within Capuozzo's path. He fly-hacks on and is unlucky to to rescue it before it rolls out of play.

Minute 77: As it turns out, Capuozzo did rescue the ball, and it was Isiekwe who ended up taking it out as he came across, so it's Italy's throw-in. They take it, dummy maul, and start what looks like it would've been a training ground overcomplicated intricate passing move, but Menoncello drops part 1 of 68, and Ludlam is quickest to react and get his nose down on it. Itoje thinks he sees a gap, so he picks and goes, and requires Mitchell backing him up to recover the ball. England set up another ruck to recover their 9 and Ludlam is caught by an unfortunate clash of heads in the tackle. Both players go down holding their heads and this feels like exactly what the HIA is designed for. Instead, the referee just tells Ludlam to stay lying down and carries on playing, securing his part in a future big concussion lawsuit.

Mitchell box-kicks long and Malins does a good job on the chase to make the tackle, but Italy offload and go back to the middle.

Minute 78: Italy carry hard and offload well and Ludlam makes a good tackle, despite not looking comfortable or steady. Capuozzo goes on an adventure down the flank, but Walker does well to track him and then knock him back, but it's still very quick Italian ball. Ludlam flies up for another tackle and I'm willing the ref to stop the game because he really doesn't look comfortable - I can't tell if it's dizziness or just an injury, but he's very slow getting to his feet for both tackles he made in this minute.

Italy are slowed down a little bit and, while England are still making some questionable decisions in defence, they are keeping Italy at around halfway without any great difficulty. Highlights include Chessum screaming "FUCKING MOVE" to Ben Earl who was not working hard enough at setting the defensive line properly, and Farrell getting embarrassed by a lock forward stepping round him.

Minute 79: For a moment, it looks like Italy have space down the left, but England keep calm and number up, and Mitchell comes up from deep to cover the outside attacker. Italy have made 10m though and celebrate by promptly passing the ball 15m backwards across three passes for no good reason and then nearly dropping it. However, it might be a genius attacking move, as England lose concentration with the excitement of a potential loose ball and don't drift properly, leaving a massive gap between Ludlam (still running, still tackling, still should be having an HIA) and Lawrence, which Capuozzo accelerates through. Farrell does well to cover across and bring him down - say what you will about Farrell (and I do), but you can never accuse him of not running his heart out for the team. Lawrence redeems himself for giving Ludlam too much to do and opening that gap, by pulling off a text-book turnover and breaking away into midfield. Unfortunately he then looks to pass when there was definitely ground that he could've made by straightening, and his pass hits the deck. Walker picks up on the bounce and nearly gets a beautiful offload to Smith, but it's a hard take and Smith spills it forwards.

Minute 80: Polledri is going off with a shoulder injury, but unfortunately he's superceded by Zuliani having to go off for an HIA, so he has to turn around at the touchline and come back on. I hope staying on for this extra minute isn't what exacerbates the injury to cause his latest long layoff.

Italy make a solid job of the scrum and try a clever move that doesn't work and leaves the ball on the floor. I'm fairly certain they knock it on there, but the ref doesn't see it, so they can pick up and carry on. There are a couple of phases around the 22, before Bruno succumbs to the KADAB disease and kicks the ball dead touch in goal. If he'd waited another 2 seconds, we could've ended the game and put everyone, and me, out of our miseries.

Minute 81: England opt for the scrum over the 22 drop and Polledri is definitely coming off now, with Italy going a bit Eddie Jones with 3 locks on the park. Lots of time taken, the scrum is not completed, and my torment endures.

Minute 82: The ball gets to the back of the scrum, but Mitchell isn't passing it out for some reason, despite us clearly only having taken the scrum so that we can end the game and the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to. Fusco gets as bored of this as I am and tackles Mitchell off the ball to give away a penalty, but we don't need it as England rally to set up a ruck so that we can finally kick the ball off the park.

That last 12 minutes was not enthralling. At all. Literally fighting falling asleep in front of the television.

[Puja]

I remember having literally no reaction to that try. It seemed like a complete nothing moment and indicated how uninvested in the game I was, but you've done a good job of explaining why it was so odd. It should have been exciting, but Italy just looked awful. Have they really improved and we were just making them look worse, or were they having a bad day? These games are never fun to watch. Even when we have exciting players out there.

I hope Wales step up from last week.

I think Italy are definitely massively improved from where they were, and I actually fancy them to give the Irish a fright next weekend (although they won't have enough to finish the job). But they do range from the sublime to the ridiculous within the same match, and sometimes within the same phase.

Puja

[Which Tyler]

Thank you

[Mr Mwenda]

Cheers, puja. Interesting as ever.